Type to search

Jenerari finds love in Masvingo

Local News

Jenerari finds love in Masvingo


Masvingo yazviita zvekare. Kkkkk yes, it’s true Boss Cader is hot over heels in Masvingo. Be green with envy girls one of yours here wapinda machena.

Back to that later!

 One thing HOTH likes about the ancient city is that the people will never disappoint. They will always come up with earth-shattering anecdotes. KumaGumtrees uko tinonzwirira hedu.  Who can deny that? 

Never mind the pea-brained people from the land of Mashona suffering from the Dunning-Kruger effects. They think they are superior to everyone else in Zimbabwe. 

Well, for the sake of clarity Dunning-Kruger effect, in psychology is a cognitive bias whereby people with limited knowledge or competence in a given intellectual or social domain greatly overestimate their own knowledge or competence in that domain relative to objective criteria or to the performance of their peers or of people in general. 

So Karanga guys you are not inferior to any tribe-Ndebele, Zezuru, Ndau, Tonga-you name it. I will come back to that in a moment. Allow me to drift to something that happened last weekend.

So this Chitova team was embarrassed for the umpteenth time, despite tonnes of resources poured in by their political minion in Chiredzi. 

HOTH is reliably informed that the underling was throwing money like confetti at the HQ guys. Dzikamai bambo. You think supporting war veterans’ children with checkered and bogus political history can make them better than the war veteran themselves? 

You are a political rookie who is naïve on how Zimbo politicians live with their hearts in their mouths. They don’t want to associate with dogmatic novices. Where on earth do you think one member of the politburo can overturn a decision or endorsement made by the full politburo?   

Gomo ramakwira paHQ rine makata mkoma. Hamusati mava kuzvinyanya here? Chinhu makawana chiripo ichi muchibva kumarimuka uko kwamakadzingirwa makuhwa. Kkkk oh ye it’s called Offi..cc…ia..all secrecy in companies.

Ko imwi amwe acho toziva hedu nguva yamanga muri mumastructure echinja. Makazo introjuswa zuro paminisita wezvenhimbe nejakwara rekusakura apo maunzwa nemudhara wamunoti igamatox uya. Irisei huruva?

Apa manga mambotiza munyika nenyaya yemingava yezvicherwa. Ndokudzoka muchitsvaga protection. Maiwana mokanganwa huruva yakakusvitsai ikoko, so tsikai chepakati muzorore. Chinhu chine vene vacho ichi sekutaura kwavo.

Well, HOTH is aware of the shenanigans in the gumba-kumba club or all the tomfoolery at the shake-shake building. What I know is the building is not only endowed with stupid people, but it has a surplus of them. Everybody has the right to be stupid. It’s only that this club is now abusing that privilege. So, never mind them.

HOTH is awe-struck by the latest gossip. It’s still under wraps. At first I couldn’t believe my ears. I thought someone was pulling my leg when I heard Masvingo has now become the hunting ground for Jenarari. 

Hey, man! Are you kidding me? Do you mean our real Jenerari? Jenarari, as in our Cader, Cader in flesh or some fuc…n’ clone? Kkkkk…Huya uone ugodzokera!!! Oh yes, I heard properly it’s our Général d’armée. He picked the apple of his eye in Masvingo who is now letting his imagination run away with him. 

So, HOTH is told our minister of words who is responsible for transporting words is the go-between for Boss Cader and Mona, Maona or Moana. The name doesn’t matter after all. Moana’s mom is into buying and selling clothes. Something like boutiques, you understand? 

The minister’s daughter at a local university is a close ally of the said woman. That’s why her mom is involved. HOTH akamirira kuona mombo ichikanyaira, ichivuya vuno kunyanda. Heee heee chegorero tichaona chitota chakapfeka bhurugwa. Kkkkk Seka hako HOTH nyoka inomera magaro chete gore rino.

Another thing I like about Boss Cader is that he likes trending fashion. He loves women who know expensive, fashionable clothes produced by leading fashion houses. You know those women who will be part of the annual Haute Couture fashion week. 

HOTH is told this hottest Masvingo lady is known for following fashion trends. She likes creating a long line silhouette; playing around with shapes and the 80s-inspired oversized boyfriend blazers. 

Man! The fashion trend spotter said with the help of shoulder pads, the outerwear cinches in her waist elongates her legs. It’s good, Mona, Moana or Maona loves rocking that look with a pair of straight-leg trousers or leather shorts for an ultra-modern style matching with colours that suit trend including powder blue, charcoal, and neutrals. From the description I heard she can easily dress this up or down for an effortlessly chic aesthetic.

Unfortunately, that other one kakazoda kukura musoro. Only a few with ulterior motives are sympathising with her. She is just tasting her own medicine. Vanhu vanodakutsvaga vakatarira mudenga semajenya vanonetsa. Munhu kugara akaita sesoso. She did the same to my favourite footballer. My guy was a warrior before she reduced him to a tramp and drooling halfwit. Now she wants the whole world to come to her side. 

What goes around comes around my sister. Don’t try to hotspot us on your problems. We have enough to attend to, not your pranks. We have had enough of you during your good times and these trying times you are going through. 

So, eat a chill pill my sister we are not on your side. All along you thought Karma didn’t know your address? Manje Karma has everyone’s addresses, including yours. We are opening bhero nyuwani, saka zven’en’ere n’en’ere chimbomirai vakoma muteerere muviri.  

Anyway let’s leave gold diggers and concentrate on the positive developments in town at the moment. Does anyone know the luckiest woman in town? As a guy from Gumtrees I am trying to figure out how their date is going on, especially if it should be kept a secret-at least for now. Help me guys, I think secret dating is one of the most arduous thing those in the relationship has to endure.   

 Until next time enjoy the rest of your week. Tichiimba Chipo chiroorwa tipembere, tidye makeke titambe muchato. Adios!!!https://masvingomirror.com

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


Enjoy our stories? Please spread the word: