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Chiredzi pastor’s wife elopes with SA boyfriend

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Chiredzi pastor’s wife elopes with SA boyfriend


It has been a long week with bouts of biting chilly weather forcing HOTH to buy more blankets. Charova sei chando chakwidza hamba mumuti. It was cold guys and I am sure most of you will agree with me that this year is likely to go down history as one of the coldest years in living history.
I am not so sure if it is just Masvingo town where the cold is so biting or elsewhere its even worse. I have been to several towns this year and I hardly saw that public parliament since the beginning of the winter season; which means it has been temporarily adjourned on condition of the weather.
You know the parliament I am talking about. Iya yekumukira pafence or panze pemagedhi iine mapulling socks or mabonnet mumusoro apa vakapfeka mamastombi nesocks ebhora aya emitaro mutaro.
Kkkkkk seka Hako HOTH. Zvimbuya izvozvo zvinenge zvine mamorning gown zvakasunga mazambia or zvichari. Ukaona nyaya yako yataurwa in that parliament chinekewooo you are finished my brodha or my sisi woo! They have details marinated with the truth, grilled on half-baked truth and outright falsified information before being served by know-it-all chefs.
At one time HOTH was lackadaisically doing his rounds around town we he bumped into one of those parliamentary session where a certain a pastor’s wife ivo mai mudhikoni vaye. Nemiwo pastor munonyanyawo imi hamuzivi zviri mumastreets umu here? Makanganwa here kuti the streets in that town were named after ladies of the night? It’s unfortunate that you would think you can get a soulmate in such a town.
So according to the public parliament the pastor came to the sugar-producing town as a bachelor and met his better half who was one of the a lost sheep in his flock he was shepherding. You know those churches that forward faith to various ministries.
Aaah the sheep had no O levels and the pastor thought she should be mai mufundisi vakakwana vane maOs akakwana. Kuona kwenyu kwanga kusina kuipa hako but munhu wacho waimaiitira kani. Ndiwo aya ataigara tichiti marova rovaka aya.
So mai pastor after passing her O levels courtesy of Mr. Pastor, she went to graduate as a teacher from a local teachers college. Unfortunately, she was deployed outside town. Let’s call her mai Rats or mai Makozho the choice is yours. HOTH would like think that when the problem started. Ko maface ekuya ndeeJoni zve kuya.
So muJoni Joni, (I heard in Ndebele the call them Injiva) came for his annual visits and met mai Makozho. In our neighbouring country they call them Makwerekwere. Let’s call him Well, the Injiva yaka belivhisa madam vamufundisi and told her that Johannesburg streets are glittering with gold. Apa vanoda zvinhu sechangani bag. Let’s call our Injiva Penny Penny because he made believe that ChiShangani chilungu.
So mai Rats started receiving goodies from the Injiva. Every time he sent his parents groceries and other goodies mai Sibanda would receive hers. This made her think there is (LG) Life is Good in Mzanzi and she decided to run a leg in the month of goat kkkkkkk.
But Cde you thought poto yamakabvutira muzodziwa waMwari makamboona kuti yakubooka here? Sometimes you pull funny stunts in a bid to convince the world that you are the main actor but before you know it you will be in real sh**t. Did you take a look at the pastor himself. He looks like a he is not feeling well.
So you think you fixed him by snatching his wife but inguva chete but wakatandikira mambure mudziva rine ngwena. When they say nguva ndimaenzanise they will be trying to tell you something iwe musoro bhangu. It’s just a matter of time kungwara kwese kunenge kwapera uko.
Pastor you are left with the kids and you have been frantically seeking transfer from your elders in your church, but you learnt the hard way henyu. Sorry for that. I hope you will be transferred from that congregation because I am sure it is traumatizing to stand on the pulpit preaching to a congregation that despises you. But it’s not your fault munhuwa aMwari.
You should know that all that glitters in not gold. After all there was no glitter paya because she is just an ordinary woman who was not gifted with looks. Itype dzana mai Mahofa hadzo dziya. Kushata sesadza rembwa. Aaah hezvo nhaka hangu! The days of our lives are short, we have no option but to pursue peace.

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